Delusional Love

On Sunday at 10 a.m., Yoonwoo was awakened by the loud hymns coming from the church in front of his house.Grabbing his phone, he saw a new KakaoTalk chatroom invitation. Hyerim Jo and an unsaved contact – likely Jieun as “LJE” – were already chatting. Jieun had told him to call her “noona” instead of her name but the title still felt awkward, so he often accidentally called her name without thinking.

Yoonwoo, are you awake? How’s your stomach?

Yoonwoo, hi.

Both Hyerim and Jieun, who seemed to handle their alcohol better than Yoonwoo, had started messaging from 9 a.m.

The movie starts at 3.10 this afternoon. Do you want to come with us?

How about we meet before and have some hangover soup?

Unni, you’re not thinking of having a hangover drink, are you?

Unni?

Unni, why aren’t you answering?

The last messages from Hyerim were sent at 9.53 a.m., but Jieun hadn’t responded.

Still groggy, Yoonwoo drank a glass of water and replied:

Yeah, my stomach’s fine.

See, I told you it was fine since it was just soju. You could’ve had a bit more.

Jieun responded quickly to Yoonwoo’s message, seemingly ignoring Hyerim’s messages on purpose.

Noona, thanks for the drinks yesterday. How can I repay you?

Buy me a coffee later.

No problem. And when I get my allowance next month, I’ll pay for dinner.

No, you don’t have to do that. Usually, the seniors pay, so it’s fine for you just to buy coffee. It’s okay.

Yoonwoo knew he wouldn’t feel right leaving it at that.

Yoonwoo, do you know where the cinema is? Let’s go together later.

I don’t know exactly, but I can find it.

What about going together?

Yoonwoo preferred going alone, but refusing Hyerim’s invitation only to end up on the same bus seemed ridiculous. He quickly agreed.

Yeah, sounds good.

Guys, what about me? Aren’t we having a hangover drink?

Unni? Hangover drink? I thought it was hangover soup.

I think I need to eat lunch at home and then go out. Would it be okay if I just met you guys at the theater?

No, Yoonwoo. Unni’s house is right next to the cinema. She’s telling us to come early to drink with her.

Ah, I see.

Yoonwoo, still dizzy from last night’s single bottle, couldn’t fathom drinking again.

Yoonwoo can’t join us for lunch. Oh well, there’s nothing we can do about it. Hyerim, you come.

Then I can’t come with Yoonwoo. I’ll eat lunch at home too.

You don’t have to worry about me, Hyerim. Go ahead. I can find my way.

No, Yoonwoo. If she goes early, she’ll only talk about drinking.

Hmph, both of you are so stingy. I’ll drink alone then.

Unni, don’t drink, okay? It’s bad to smell like alcohol in the theater.

A little bit won’t smell.

No, it’s just you who doesn’t notice it. Your varsity jacket smells like alcohol.

Ha! Sure, Hyerim. I mean, really!

Unni! No, really.

Alright, I’ll wear different clothes then.

That’s not what I meant. I meant don’t come after drinking.

I’ll wear a hoodie, then it should be fine, right?

Ah, seriously.

Yoonwoo smiled at Hyerim and Jieun’s rapid-fire exchange. He wondered if Jieun’s varsity jacket really did smell of alcohol.

Though still uneasy about meeting Hyerim, he felt oddly at ease with Jieun. Despite her extroversion, she was unique - petite and cute in appearance, but lively and straightforward in personality. She spoke her mind without hurting others, perhaps due to her atypical interests. Plus, she’d thoughtfully given him chocolate milk last night to ease his drunkenness.

Jieun reminded him of someone he’d known before, which might explain why she felt familiar when they first met.

At 1 p.m., Yoonwoo and Hyerim met at the bus stop, well before the movie. Hyerim wanted to intervene before Jieun could arrive smelling of alcohol.

“Yoonwoo, you weren’t pressured to come, were you? Sorry, Jieun can be a bit... you know.”

“Don’t worry, I’m glad she invited me. But it’s been a while since I’ve been to a theater, so I’m a bit nervous.”

Hyerim was dressed differently than usual, wearing an H-line skirt and white shirt with loafers, a departure from her usual jeans and Converse. The clothes enhanced her well-maintained figure, making her look more mature than usual.There was subtle sensuality to her appearance due to her clothes and the perfume she had used.

Yoonwoo resolved to keep his gaze above Hyerim’s neck, wary of misunderstandings.

“Really? What was the last movie you saw? Who did you see it with?”

Yoonwoo furrowed his brow. “Um, I think it was “Old Partner.” A group of us from school saw it together.”

“Wow, the documentary with the cow? I bet the kids didn’t like that.”

“It was okay. It was sad when the cow died.”

“Um, about yesterday, Yoonwoo. You didn’t know any of the movies we discussed. Do you like films like “Old Partner,” or do you have a favorite genre?”

“I don’t watch often, but when I do, it’s usually horror or thrillers. I saw ‘Paranormal Activity’ recently.”

“Wow, that’s kind of unexpected. I wouldn’t have guessed. Why horror?”

Why did he like horror films? It was a difficult question to answer honestly. He found a strange pleasure in watching demonic entities disrupt happy families, lovers, or friends. When he watched “Insidious,” Yoonwoo had rooted for the demon seeking to destroy the family, not the father saving his son. It wasn’t like he was harming anyone by watching. But revealing that might raise questions about his state of mind.

“Um... I just like ghosts and monsters?”

“Oh, well then, maybe next time we could watch together. But I’m not really a fan of horror, though.”

“Ah, the bus is here.”

Hyerim seemed to want to say something on the bus, opening her mouth several times, but it was too crowded to continue their conversation. The ride took less than ten minutes. Upon arrival, Hyerim called Jieun.

“Unni, what are you doing?”

“About to eat. I just got some beef soup delivered. Why?”

“So, you haven’t started drinking yet? We’ve arrived.”

“What? Why did you guys come so early? There are still two hours left.”

“We came early to stop you from drinking.”

“What? Seriously? Aren’t you taking this too far?”

“So, did you order any alcohol or not?”

“I didn’t order any.”

“Really?” Hyerim raised her eyebrows and glanced at Yoonwoo. “I’m surprised that you listened for once, Unni.”

“Why order more when I have plenty? Ever tried vodka with beef soup? It’s surprisingly—”

“We’re coming over now.”

“Why are you so strict today? You usually let these things slide. It’s not like I drink during the day that often.”

“Even so, not today. Yoonwoo and I are going to head there now. I know your door lock code.”

“What? Hey, bringing Yoonwoo is crossing the line. I mean, I’m a woman, after all! I haven’t even showered yet. And my place is a mess. I mean, my underwear is hanging out to dry.”

“Then hurry up and put the alcohol away.”

“Ugh, alright. Hyerim, you are one intimidating junior. I spent my own money, and I can’t even drink the alcohol I bought. What a hard life I’m living!”

“Just get ready and come out. Yoonwoo and I will look around the mall.”

“So I can drink in the evening, right?”

Hyerim sighed and hung up.

“You heard most of it, right, Yoonwoo? Let’s look at some clothes until she comes.”

“Uh... Is it okay to just hang up like that?”

“It’s fine. I used to think that’s just her personality, but lately, I seriously think she’s an alcoholic. She needs a bit of a talking-to. Is it normal to keep a bottle of vodka at home?”

“Um, but still…”

“Everyone calls her cute, so she thinks she’s some kind of alcohol fairy. Someone needs to intervene. Next time, I’m going to her place and taking some of it away. Anyway, let’s go, Yoonwoo.”

“Okay.”

He could see Hyerim was genuinely concerned about Jieun’s health, even if she was being strict. Jieun probably knew that, which was why she listened.

Hyerim and Jieun seem to have a good friendship.

Watching them made Yoonwoo wonder if he should also intervene when Rabbit drank. But would Rabbit listen to him? If the usually distant Rabbit got angry, he might not dare speak up. As he followed Hyerim into the mall, he decided to try at least.

They browsed clothes, and Hyerim persuaded him to try on black jeans from a well-known brand. The slim, long jeans fit well, neither too tight nor loose.

“Yoonwoo, you suit those jeans. Your legs are long and slim, so they fit you perfectly. You should buy them.”

He glanced at the price tag.

Discounted to seventy-nine thousand won? Crazy.

“Ah, no, it’s okay. I have plenty of pants.”

All he had were old pants he’d been wearing since high school, but spending eighty thousand won on new jeans was beyond his tight budget.

“The jeans are perfect for you, Yoonwoo…”

Those jeans seemed destined never to be his. As Yoonwoo pondered this, Hyerim stared intently at them, lost in thought.

“How about we look at clothes for you instead, Hyerim? I don’t know much about clothes, and I’m not planning to buy anything.”

And he didn’t have the money.

“Me? I don’t need anything. Oh, right. Yoonwoo, when’s your birthday?”

“It’s October twenty-sixth.”

“That’s around when midterms end, right?”

Yoonwoo didn’t understand the sudden shift in conversation to his birthday, but he suspected that such questions often carried a hint of invitation for reciprocity.

“When’s your birthday, Hyerim?”

“Mine? It’s in March. Why?”

“Just wondering since you asked. I was curious, too.”

“You’re curious about my birthday?” She giggled. “It’s March twelfth.”

Suddenly, Hyerim’s phone rang.

“Unni?”

“Where are you guys?”

“Wow, you’re ready already?”

“Without alcohol, I couldn’t eat much. I showered and came out.”

“You’re out already? Where are you?”

“I’m on the first floor at the cosmetics store. You?”

“We’re at the men’s clothing store, third floor.”

“Let’s meet on the eighth floor then.”

“Eighth floor? Isn’t the theater on the ninth?”

“I want ice cream.”

“Wow, Unni, you sounded like a kid when you said that.”

“What? Do only kids eat ice cream? Adults like it too.”

“Alright, we’ll see you on the eighth floor then.”

Hyerim hung up and turned back to Yoonwoo.

“What did she say?” Yoonwoo asked, the surrounding noise having muffled Jieun’s side of the conversation.

“We’re meeting on the eighth floor. She wants to eat ice cream. There’s a Baskin Robbins there.”

“Ice cream? That sounds like her.”

“Right?” Hyerim nodded.

“I should pay this time since she covered the other night and the movie. Anything else we should get? Like popcorn?”

“Probably not. She only drinks beer when watching a movie, but I’ll make sure she doesn’t drink this time.”

“Jieun Noona is predictable, isn’t she?”

Yoonwoo hoped Jieun would opt for popcorn or a snack to offset the chicken and beer she’d treated him to earlier. Covering that cost strained his finances. Even with Rabbit’s fifty thousand won, which he intended to keep untouched, spending now meant skipping meals next week. But it felt right.

To Yoonwoo, kindness was a debt requiring repayment. His life held no unreciprocated kindness. Even his parents scolded him for results disproportionate to their investments. He believed kindness wasn’t always genuine, sometimes extended reluctantly due to social obligation. Yoonwoo lived assuming only such favors were available to him. Unreturned, they’d quickly render him worthless.

He once prepared White Day chocolates in case a classmate gave him some. Unfortunately, his mother discovered it, threw a fit and discarded every piece into the trash.

“Yoon-ha! It means hello, Yoonwoo,” Jieun called loudly as she came up the escalator. Her greeting was strange.

“Unni, don’t! It’s embarrassing!” Hyerim covered her eyes.

“Oh, again! Why is Hyerim oppressing me lately? She won’t even let me drink.”

Yoonwoo saw she was wearing a hoodie with jeans, as she had promised. She wore skinny jeans, which made her look like she was wearing children’s clothes because of her petite height and slender legs.

Is there a place that sells adult clothes in such a size?

Her oversized zip-up hoodie, whether intentional or not, added to her cuteness.

“Unni, what’s with the cute outfit today?”

“I’m naturally a bit cute,” Jieun grinned. “Wait, what are you doing?”

Hyerim grabbed Jieun’s shoulders and buried her face in her collarbone. Jieun was startled and struggled, but she was too weak to escape Hyerim’s grip.

“You, is that what you’re into? No wonder you weren’t dating any guys. So, you’ve been eyeing me all this time! Hey, I’m not that easy!”

“You don’t smell like alcohol? So you didn’t drink today?”

“Gosh. Even my mom wasn’t like this to me.”

“Unni, does your mom know about the vodka at your house?”

“No.”

“Wouldn’t she act this way if she knew?”

“She’ll never know, so it’s okay.”

Hyerim hugged Jieun, both jostling and talking loudly. Yoonwoo was embarrassed as he realized people were looking at them.

“Noona, I’ll buy the ice cream. Let’s go.”

“I’m going to eat something expensive, you know.”

“It’s okay! Let’s go,” Yoonwoo said as he ushered them out.

Since Hyerim had also given him macarons and coffee, he thought this would also be a good opportunity to clear that debt.

“Noona, Hyerim, tell me what you’ll order.”

“I want an Oreo shake!”

“Gosh! Unni, what’s up with you today.”

“Yoonwoo! Hyerim is nagging me again!”

Oreo shakes weren’t just for kids.But loudly announcing one’s order was something else. A nearby child enjoying the same thing made it funnier. Hyerim and Yoonwoo ordered single cups. Jieun walked ahead, sipping her shake, looking like a kid.

“Oh, how cute.”

“Ugh... Stop it.”

Hyerim kept poking Jieun’s cheeks playfully, and Jieun’s annoyance made her seem even younger, which was amusing.

Yesterday, she had seemed like a reliable senior when they were drinking, but now Yoonwoo noticed how small she was standing next to him. He felt like he was taking care of a child.