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I Fell in Love With My Tomboy Friend’s Avatar

2

Chapter 2

9

“Grazie bear, it’s been 100 days since we became friends!”

 

Eunho didn’t know if friends counted 100-day anniversaries, but he would never forget the memory of that day.

 

“Close your eyes and just press the arrow keys I tell you to. Got it? You can’t open your eyes.”

 

As soon as he heard Ruby’s adorable voice, Eunho squeezed his eyes shut. Even though Ruby had no way of knowing whether he obeyed or not, Eunho kept his eyes closed as he tapped the arrow keys.

 

Ruby giggled. “You’re so funny! You’re bumping your head against a tree, Gray-Gray. A little more to the left.”

 

His fingers obeyed. About 40 seconds later, Ruby finally said, “You can open your eyes now.”

 

He blinked. His screen was filled with blazing torches.

 

“Ruby—”

 

“I worked super hard on this. It took an hour to check the mini map, set it up, and log in with an alt character to make sure it worked. It was so tricky!”

 

“Ruby… I’m really touched, seriously…”

 

Ruby had placed mining torches on the ground, in the shape of a heart. The first heart Ruby gave to Eunho. Her character was spinning around on the screen with joy emotes. Ruby giggled again.

 

“Will you stay friends with me forever, Grazie?”

 

“Of course!”

 

He was ready for more than just friendship. Whether it was 100 days or 365 days, he was confident he could be with Ruby for thousands of years.

 

“Fuck—Ruby…”

 

Eunho stared in utter despair at Jeongwon. She was pale–faced and stammering an explanation, while still making an effort to cover the monitor.

 

Jeongwon Yoo—how could the Jeongwon he’d known for over ten years be Ruby? Eunho silently thought back to memories of Jeongwon’s typical behavior.

 

“Got a light?” Jeongwon had been looking for a lighter, not a torch.

 

“Hey, is that your last cigarette? Give it to me.” He could still see Jeongwon with her hand stuck out impatiently.

 

He recalled Jeongwon’s face making a V-sign with her index and middle fingers. “How are you supposed to do this?”

 

Beneath Ruby’s high, pouty voice, Eunho was now hearing an undercurrent of Jeongwon’s.

 

“So what if it’s the last one? Hand it over.”

 

No, Ruby wasn’t like that. She said things like, “Oh, this is tooooo expensive.”

 

And he would reply with, “Don’t worry, I’ll buy it for you.”

 

Jeongwon’s voice invaded his thoughts again. “Fine, I’ll pay for it. Here’s 500 won.”

 

“No, no, no…” Eunho whispered.

 

“Hey, Eunho,” Jeongwon said frantically, “This is—”

 

“No!” he yelled.

 

Ruby’s hands should only hold a healer’s staff. Ruby’s hands should only bear the Twilight Diamond Ring, which was impossible to purchase unless you’d been dating in-game for over 100 days.

 

Those hands weren’t supposed to be clutching a cigarette stolen from a friend’s bag.

 

“Eun—Eunho!”

 

His reaction to hearing his name fall again and again from Jeongwon’s lips was visceral.

 

Nausea overtook him and he fled from his chair. He rushed to the bathroom, pushing people aside.

 

Without properly closing the door, he vomited everything he’d eaten into the toilet. It wasn’t just food that left him. Memories with Ruby, monsters hunted with Ruby, dungeons explored with Ruby, friendship-linked fashion items bought with Ruby…

 

“No, this can’t be happening,” Eunho moaned. “Ruby, Ruby…”

 

No matter how much his stomach convulsed, the memories with Ruby wouldn’t leave his throat. He rinsed his mouth at the sink and looked up at the mirror.

 

In the mirror was a man devastated by heartbreak, tears filling bloodshot eyes.

 

“Ruby!” he cried out.

 

With that, he kicked open the bathroom door and ran from the PC cafe.

 

Jeongwon—who had followed him to the bathroom out of concern—was pushed aside as Eunho bolted from the building. She stared blankly after him.

 

“Was it seriously so shocking that he actually threw up over this?”

 

***

 

Ruby wasn’t just a game character or mere gaming friend. She was Eunho’s friend and lover, savior and goddess, the mistress who reformed Eunho’s entire world.

 

“Wake up, Grazie-wacie.”

 

His life changed its trajectory, starting with morning calls he’d always get after buying Ruby limited edition avatar accessories.

 

“Grazie, you get good grades even while gaming?” she’d once gasped.

 

Because Ruby admired his intelligence, he’d cracked open his textbooks—even during raids—and became top of his class.

 

“I want the moonlight set, Grazie…”

 

Out of a desire to grant Ruby’s every wish, he took on any job he could get, whether on-campus or off-campus, and saved money. Professors all started bringing work to Eunho, saying he was admirably diligent, and his position within his department became steady. Though half the money he earned went to Ruby.

 

“Ruby… I fucking loved you, damn it…”

 

Thanks to Ruby, Eunho’s life became healthy, organized, and productive. All thanks to his kind, lovely, and cute goddess, Ruby.

 

Eunho had been lying in bed, gazing blankly at his ceiling for days. He barely found the energy to answer the shill ringing of his phone.

 

“Hey, are you in contact with Ruby?” the guild master asked. “Why isn’t she logging in?”

 

“Hey…” Eunho croaked.

 

“Oh shit. What’s wrong?”

 

Eunho nearly failed to suppress the scream building in his throat.

 

“Are you okay? Why does your voice sound like that? I thought I called the wrong number for a second”

 

“I want to die…”

 

“Woah, when did we get close enough to talk about stuff like that?”

 

The guild master’s voice was so flustered, Eunho could practically feel him sweating through the phone.

 

He just lay face up, resting his phone against one cheek as he listened to the guild master’s pseudo lecture.

 

When was the last time he showered? When did he last eat? Even as these thoughts crossed his mind, tears began to seep into his sheets as he imagined Ruby’s voice again. If Ruby told him to shower, he would shower, if she told him to eat he would eat…

 

“Anyway,” the guild master said awkwardly. “Let me know if you get in contact with Ruby. And well, you know… You gotta live, man.”

 

The phone call ended with the guild master’s deeply uncomfortable consolation. It seemed Ruby also found herself unable to log into Gun Tales, and had gone radio silent.

 

“Ruby, you’re staying away too—No, I mean Jeongwon—No, Ruby…”

 

His brain had started malfunctioning, trying to escape from reality, and still incapable of equating Ruby and Jeongwon.

 

Eunho removed the phone from his cheek and returned to staring at the ceiling.

 

“Jeongwon… This is all Jeongwon’s fault.”

 

Jeongwon took Ruby away. Whether Jeongwon was Ruby or Ruby was Jeongwon, that didn’t matter.

 

When Eunho discovered Jeongwon’s secret, Ruby disappeared from Eunho’s life.

 

If Jeongwon hadn’t been found out, Eunho could have continued his relationship with Ruby. He didn’t want to know the truth. It didn’t matter whether Ruby was a lie or an illusion or whatever. Anything would have been fine, as long as he could be with Ruby. He didn’t need to know the reality. The one who shattered Eunho’s fantasy with a hammer was none other than Jeongwon. She made a fatal mistake and destroyed Eunho’s paradise in the process.

 

Eunho did nothing wrong. He just fucking loved Ruby.

 

If Jeongwon had behaved properly from the start, if she had thoroughly hidden her true identity, if she had gone to a partnered PC room 3 hours away on purpose—No, if she had gone to faraway PC room from the very beginning—

 

“Jeongwon Yoo, this is all your fault!”

 

It was all her fault. Jeongwon took Ruby away. She killed Ruby. She completely crushed all the happy memories Eunho had of his friendship with the lovely healer.

 

He couldn’t be the only one unhappy. Jeongwon had to feel some sense of responsibility for this horrible situation too. Eunho called Jeongwon while tears streamed sideways down his face.

 

“He—hello?”

 

That detestable voice. Eunho screamed as if to pierce through the ceiling. “You psychotic murderer! You killed Ruby!”

 

“What are you saying, you crazy bastard…”

 

Tears flowed across his cheekbones and over his ears, soaking the pillow. Eunho just kept wailing, ignoring Jeongwon’s protests.

 

“Give Ruby back!”

 

***

 

A miserable Eunho trudged to a quiet cafe near his home. It was a private cafe with hardly any customers. He opened the cafe door and entered with the idea that he had to accomplish at least one thing today. A light chime sounded, and shuffled through the door with a grave look on his face. He saw Jeongwon huddled in the furthest corner of the cafe. He took a seat beside his old friend and rotated to face her.

 

Jeongwon glanced at him and quietly opened her mouth. “…Um…”

 

“Don’t talk to me in that fucking voice!” he snapped. The thought of acting calmly to punish Jeongwon instantly melted away. As soon as he heard Jeongwon’s loathsome voice, memories of Ruby clawed at his heart, and it became impossible to maintain his composure.

 

She let out a sound of disbelief. “Let’s at least order drinks before we do this. There’s a rule here: one drink per person—”

 

“Don’t order anything. If there’s a drink in front of me, I might pour it on you.”

 

“Fuck.” Jeonwon threw her hands in the air. “What do you want me to do?”

 

“Don’t curse with Ruby’s voice!” he yelled.

 

“This is my voice!” Jeongwon struck her chest in frustration. Eunho covered his face with his palms, unable to look at her anymore.

 

“What are we going to do about my Ruby…” he mumbled. “What are we going to do? Answer me, Jeongwon. If you hadn’t been discovered, Ruby and I would have been happy.”

 

“I am Ruby, what are you saying—”

 

“Don’t you dare, Jeongwon Yoo.” Eunho removed his hands from his face and glared at Jeongwon. “How dare you compare your worthless self to Ruby? Are you out of your mind?”

 

Jeongwon dropped her head and sat in silence for a while. The tense atmosphere emanating from their corner was so palpable that the cafe owner was trembling behind the counter, unwilling to scold them for not ordering drinks.

 

Jeongwon carefully raised her head. Avoiding Eunho’s distrustful eyes, she spoke. “First, I have something to say. We’ll be expelled from our guild if we don’t show up anymore. Let’s figure out how to navigate this like adults. Would it work if I stay out of your sight as much as possible? Or—”

 

“Our guild?” Eunho shot daggers at Jeongwon. “Our guild? What are you talking about? The guild belongs to Ruby and me, not you. Jeongwon, have you lost your mind?”

 

“You’re the one who’s lost it,” she half-shouted. “You crazy bastard…”

 

Any hope of communication between them was rapidly fizzling out. Jeongwon began picking at her hangnails, expression torn between exasperation and anxiety.

 

Gun Tales was an important part of Jeongwon’s life too. In the past few days, she’d likely had just as many sleepless nights as Eunho. He could feel her anxious eyes on the top of his bowed head.

 

“Give Ruby back, Ruby…”

 

Eunho was already mentally too far gone to reach any consensus, but neither of them couldn’t just put this situation behind them either. Too many things were already intertwined, and Jeongwon had things she couldn’t give up, too.

 

“Ruby, Ruby… Give Ruby back…” Eunho muttered, his head pressed to the table.

 

Being in the same space as Jeongwon held Ruby firmly in the forefront of his mind, driving him even further from sanity. It was despicable and infuriating that he’d thought he could leisurely drink tea in the same space as Ruby’s murderer.

 

“Hey.”

 

Eunho’s trembling legs stopped and he gripped the table. That was Ruby’s voice.

 

“Did you enjoy pretending to be a nice guy and having people call you a gentleman? Huh?”

 

Eunho’s head snapped up. Sitting before him was a person who went around stealing other people’s last cigarettes. But the voice that came from her…

 

“This is insane…”

 

It was Ruby.

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