I Fell in Love With My Tomboy Friend’s Avatar

<Aim towards your ideal, Gun Tales!>

Without consciously deciding to, Jeongwon logged into Gun Tales. She felt she needed to focus on something—whether a game or a different pursuit—to relieve the depression that washed over her at all hours of the day.

“I got kicked out of the guild.”

It was inevitable, as her login days were insufficient. The guild that Jeongwon (Ruby) was in kicked members out without warning if they didn’t log in for more than 3 days.

Although the Guild Master gave Ruby a bit more of a grace period because he favored her, Jeongwon had still been gone for too long. Nevertheless, as soon as Ruby logged in, the game’s chat window exploded.

“Wow, what is going on?”

Perhaps it was because her friends still received a notification that she was online, despite being expelled from the guild.

<Supreme Being: Wow Ruby it’s been so long>

<Revolution: Ruby *gasp* when did you come back? What have you been up to>

Those who couldn’t resist a female gamer were flooding in to ask about Ruby’s wellbeing. Looking at the male characters busy hovering in front of Ruby’s avatar, Jeongwon thought, …Should I try it?

Jeongwon put on her headset. Maybe some serious immersion was exactly what she needed to forget her current state of misery. As always, Jeongwon cleared her throat and focused hard.

I am Ruby. Ruby.

I am Ruby, the pink-haired, blue-eyed. big-breasted, gorgeous healer mage character.

“Mmm, I’ve been busy with school.” Maybe because it had been a while, but her voice felt a bit over the top. She hadn’t been this openly flirtatious before. Jeongwon turned off her headset in embarrassment, but the chat window was practically vibrating.

<Supreme Being: Ruby I’ll blow up your school, ok?>

<Richguy: Why go to school Ruby lol I will support you lol>

Their reactions were even more over the top—saying Ruby seemed even cuter than when they last saw her, saying they’ll give all the fashion items she missed out on if she’d just play with them for a bit, asking why Ruby left the guild, saying if she joins their guild they’ll give her anything and everything her heart could desire.

Everyone was swooning over Ruby.

“Hmm…”

Jeongwon naturally made the flirtatious male characters run dungeon errands. While those characters were busy showing off their digital muscles and bombarding mobs with power attacks, Ruby just sat casually on a rock.

<Steel: Ruby is pretty even when she’s just sitting there>

<HighSchoolGirl: Cute even without moving>

<Luxury: Ruby probably releases phytoncide just by breathing>

<Steel: That’s stupid, Ruby would exhale Chanel No.5>

“You’re all talking shit, you crazy bastards…”

Jeongwon looked down at the screen, butchered with overexaggerated flattery and sighed deeply. The idiots were still idiots.

But at the same time, she felt comforted. Here, everyone liked Jeongwon.

Of course, in actuality, everyone liked Ruby, the pink-haired, blue-eyed, big-breasted, gorgeous healer mage. Even so, being told from every direction that she was pretty and talented was quite reassuring.

“Darling, you didn’t get heals from other healers while I was gone, right? Hmm?”

When Jeongwon—no—Ruby showed even the slightest sign of being upset, Ruby’s mailbox was filled with all sorts of gifts and messages.

<Hawawa: No Ruby what are you saying :‘( I sent you Sacred Goddess’s Orange Cocktail in the mail>

“Mmm, thank you,” she sang.

Sacred Goddess’s Orange Cocktail. A premium item that could only be obtained once a month by those who completed all daily quests without missing a single day, packed with every possible buff that might be useful in dungeons.

Not just that, but fashion items and all sorts of buffed gifts would immediately fill Ruby’s mailbox whenever she whined.

Looking at the mailbox that was completely full to its receiving limit, and the chat messages from men saying to empty it and contact them again, Jeongwon felt something sour the joy such things once brought her.

“Wow, shit. And just like that, reality hits…”

Jeongwon knew that this was treatment she’d never receive in reality. How could this be reality—weren’t they using Jeongwon to gain attention from a pretty face? In her real life it was fortunate if she wasn’t ignored, forget receiving special treatment.

“…Should I play until 10?”

Yet that was exactly why Jeongwon didn’t want to abandon this treatment. The more people filled her mailbox, the more it seemed to fill her empty heart, bit by bit. As for reality, she could avoid facing it if she simply didn’t leave her house.

“Mm, honeybeeee. Let’s do dungeons.”

10 o’clock, 11 o’clock, 12 o’clock… Just a bit more, just one more round, last round, really last round, Jeongwon kept deceiving herself as she played well into the night. She emptied her mailbox again and again but gifts kept pouring in.

Jeongwon was already Ruby. She had to be because it felt like no one would look at her if she wasn’t Ruby.

“Damn, this is crazy. I can only sleep for three hours.”

Despite having lectures to attend the next day, Jeongwon stayed up all night. Once she realized what she had done, she hurriedly turned off her computer and lay in bed. She stared at her phone screen as the blue light of dawn crept in.

“If I close my eyes and sleep right now, right now… I can sleep for two and a half hours.”

Even knowing it wouldn’t work that way, Jeongwon closed her eyes as tightly as she could. She even tried smacking her stomach to make herself fall asleep. She rolled onto her side, tried raising her arms, desperately searching for the optimal position to fall asleep.

“…I’m screwed.”

And so Jeongwon eventually had to get up without having slept at all. She thought it might be better to just stay up. If she fell asleep now, she would definitely not make it to class on time.

Jeongwon roughly washed her face, put on a backwards cap, and headed to the lecture hall. She was so exhausted that no thoughts entered her mind.

I feel like I can’t see a foot in front of me.

She was too sleepy for her brain to work. She needed to put her bag on the chair and take out her notebook, but even simple actions were proving difficult. Jeongwon slowly put her bag on the desk, took out her notebook and put it on the chair—Ah, this isn’t right—then put the bag back in its original place.

“Hey, Jeongwon. What’s wrong? Did you pull an all-nighter?”

“No—I mean—That wasn’t what I was trying to do…”

“Wow, look at your face. Your dark circles literally come down to your chin.”

“That’s not even possible—”

“Your MBTI has a “T” doesn’t it?”

Her classmates patted Jeongwon’s back as they sat beside her. Their faces looked startled, though that could have been her sleep-deprived vision. But to everyone who looked at her, Jeongwon’s face was clearly saying“I pulled an all-nighter.” Jeongwon rubbed at her face. She was having trouble responding, even to jokes.

“Throat punch me if I fall asleep,” she mumbled.

“You’d rather die than doze off?”

“Yeah, this professor makes you present to the class if he sees you dozing off.”

“Might be better to do it. The adrenaline will wake you up.”

Jeongwon couldn’t distinguish front from back. She actually couldn’t even recognize who she was talking to right now. She felt like she was losing her mind to lack of sleep.

But of all professors she could have seen today, of course it was the one that didn’t tolerate students falling asleep even a little bit. He was ruthless and would immediately make students come to the front if caught nodding off.

“Ah, please, just smack me okay?”

“I want to hear Jeongwon present. It’s been a while,” her classmates joked. They chattered amongst each other, not taking notice of Jeongwon’s seriousness. If she had to deliver a speech in this situation, she might actually throw up. Jeongwon needed to convey her desperation and it just slipped out.

“Mmm, please help meee.”

In Ruby’s voice.

I’m screwed, shit.

She couldn’t look at her classmates’ faces. Flustered, Jeongwon pulled her cap down low and tried to put her brain in gear. She felt wide awake now.

I’m crazy, I must be crazy. I just answered my classmate in Ruby’s voice. And even threw a little tantrum. What should I do, should I kill myself? If I jump from the lecture hall now, no, it’s only the second floor, I’ll instinctively break my fall. I better run to the rooftop right now and just end it all.

Jeongwon shuddered in advance at the reaction that would undoubtedly follow her little performance.

“Are you insane, what are you doing, you think you can pull that off, that was so disgusting, you’re way too ugly to be acting like that… She felt like she could already hear them.

“What was that?”

It’s over, it’s all over. Jeongwon tightly closed her eyes.

“That was so cute, what did you just do?”

Huh?

Jeongwon cautiously lifted her head. One of her classmates patted Jeongwon’s shoulder, blushing.

“Hey, Jeongwon. That was so cute just now. What happened? Were you throwing a tantrum because you’re sleepy? So cute!”

Then she hugged Jeongwon’s shoulder, going on and on about how cute Jeongwon’s sleep-deprived performance was. The guy on Jeongwon’s other side also had a strange expression.

“What was that just now? Geez.”

His face was red. Though he tried to keep his tone lighthearted, he stumbled over his words as if they wouldn’t come out properly. Yet he couldn’t take his eyes off Jeongwon’s face.

…What’s going on?

All the girls made a fuss, crooning at her for being so adorable, saying they wanted to buy her a house to make a pretty girl happy again.

The male classmates too were busy trying to figure out what just happened, stuttering and flushing red. They were subtly scanning Jeongwon’s face.

“Jeongwon, want me to buy you coffee?” A guy who usually only exchanged greetings with her—an awkward acquaintance—had sidled up beside her.

A random guy suddenly offering to buy me coffee? Why…?

Jeongwon, bewildered, declined politely. Her heart sputtered in her chest.

Everyone’s attention was on Jeongwon. On cute Jeongwon.

***

“Eunho, Eunho!”

“Uh, yeah?”

“What are you doing, we need to get inside now.”

He came to his senses at Hayan’s voice. Eunho had been spacing out a lot lately. His chest always seemed to feel uncomfortable these days, as if something was packed tight inside, pressing down on it.

“Eunho, Eunho. We’re going in.”

“Uh, yeah.”

Playing Light Arc with Hayan was fun. It was nice to be able to play a game as avidly as he’d played Gun Tales after so long without a good game. But that feeling only lasted one or two sessions.

Hayan secretly adored gaming and called Eunho at all hours. She played games so often that it made him wonder when she’d had time to become the top of their department.

At first, Eunho enjoyed the intensity because it allowed him to forget his heavy, complicated thoughts. But as time passed, those thoughts and his depression consumed the game.

Jeongwon.

The target he was aiming at now looked like her.

“I’m going to the bathroom. Don’t go in alone! You’ll actually die if you do.”

“Oh yeah, try and kill me.”

“No, really, your character will die. It’s a high-level hunting ground there.”

“Oh.”

Still, it seemed like Hayan was trying for his sake. It was Hayan who recommended gaming saying he looked down lately. So though he tried to respond, his reactions were off., perhaps because he wasn’t concentrating.

While Hayan was in the bathroom, Eunho propped his chin on his hand and scanned the online game list installed at the PC cafe. A Gun Tales advertisement popped up.

<Aim towards your ideal, Gun Tales!>

It was announcing all sorts of rewards for the game’s 10th anniversary event.

Should I just get the rewards and leave?

They were quite luxurious rewards to ignore, even though he’d given up on the game. Items that would cost a fortune to get at any other time, and even some memorable items that couldn’t be bought with money in the first place were included.

It wouldn’t hurt to receive them, he thought casually.

Eunho logged into Gun Tales. Though he tried to delete it in anger, his original character, Graze remained. Evidently, it wasn’t a straightforward process to delete a character that possessed so many cash items.

“It still hasn’t been deleted?”

He could have sworn he’d rage-deleted it successfully, but apparently not. Eunho logged into the character. Graze had become shabby in Eunho’s absence. Almost all his friend connections were cut off and he’d been expelled from the guild.

Wondering how long he’d been cut off, Eunho scanned the friends window. User Strongest, last login 30 days ago, SoSo, last login 41 days ago. His remaining friends were all people who had taken breaks from the game longer than Eunho.

Except for one person.

“…Jeongwon?”

Ruby.

Next to Ruby floated the text “Last login 1 day ago.”

“This asshole still plays Gun Tales?”

He thought she’d quit. She should have quit at least around the same time as Eunho. But Ruby—Jeongwon—had logged into Gun Tales just yesterday.

“Eunho, what are you doing? What game is that?”

Hayan had returned from the bathroom, and was leaning on Eunho’s chair, looking down at the screen.

“Gun Tales? Why? Are you going to play that?”

“Hey, Hayan. Sorry.”

Eunho hastily turned off the computer and got up from his seat.

“What, where are you going? We just got a party.”

“I, uh, left the gas valve open. It’s an old building so it might explode.”

“So what, are you going to turn it off and come back?”

“The gas valve at my place keeps opening automatically. I need to keep closing it.”

“Huh?”

Eunho packed his bag at top speed and left the PC cafe.

Hayan watched Eunho’s retreating back with an expressionless face.