Runner-up's Revenge

“Give me the blanket, I need to throw it in the wash.”

Dowon tugged the blanket out from underneath Hana, who groaned and rolled to the other side. After some effort, the floor had finally revealed itself, and now it was time to tackle the laundry.

Walking across the freshly cleaned floor, Dowon tossed the blanket into the washing machine. Only after adding detergent and pressing the start button did he notice the vibration coming from his pocket.

Dahye Yoon: Jihyeong’s housewarming party is next Friday evening. Wanna come?

As soon as he read the message, Dowon felt like he was being suffocated under a heavy quilt. No matter how much he inhaled, the air felt as if it lacked oxygen.

Jihyeong Seo, one of his old classmates, and of course, someone he hadn’t been in contact with since graduation. Dowon didn’t even know what he had been up to all these years.

Rather than imagining Jihyeong’s face, Dowon imagined the house he lived in. A spacious, comfortable house filled with good food, where he’d invite old classmates, and Dahye showing up to the party with an expensive gift.

Jihyeong… What did he do that he could already buy a house? What was his job again? Were his grades that good?

Dowon knew these thoughts were pointless. What mattered now was figuring out how to say no to the invitation. He couldn’t keep using the convenience store as an excuse forever.

An excuse that makes sense for a Friday night but is just vague enough that she won’t suggest I cancel it and go to the housewarming party instead.

Dowon Lee: I have a family thing that day, so I can’t make it. Sorry.

His leg bounced anxiously as he waited for Dahye’s reply. He was trembling more than the nearby washing machine, starting its spin cycle.

Dahye Yoon: Oh really? Well, that’s a shame.

Dahye Yoon: Let’s meet up with Jihyeong another time, haha. He really wants to see you too.

There’s no way he actually wants to see me. Haven’t you already told him everything?

Dowon Lee failed college, failed exams, and now he was barely scraping by with part-time jobs to make ends meet.

Dowon imagined Dahye sharing this reality with all their old classmates, gossiping about him during the housewarming party. He pictured Jihyeong wanting to see for himself how pitiful Dowon had become.

Just thinking about the scene made it hard to breathe, so he leaned against the window. Dowon pressed a hand to his cheek, trying to physically shove his thoughts away.

It’s fine, I just need to avoid getting mixed up with them, Dowon thought naively.

***

“Hey, did you cut your hair?”

Dowon was stocking cigarette cartons on the counter when a familiar voice caught his attention. Dahye had entered the convenience store, twirling a strand of her hair around her finger.

“Uh… Yeah, it was time for a cut.”

“It looks better on you.”

Dahye, wearing her usual friendly expression, walked slowly toward the counter. She reached for the heated drink display but paused.

“Oh… It’s not buy one, get one anymore.”

“Coffee is buy one, get one today.”

“I’ve already had too much coffee,” she said with a sigh.

Dahye grabbed two citron teas and placed them between the cigarette cartons, awkwardly tapping the lids of the bottles.

“I’ve been working late today, and I’ve already had five cups of coffee. My stomach is feeling the consequences.”

“Ahh, that sucks.”

“You’re lucky,” she commented. “When your shift ends, you can just go home.”

Dowon froze, holding the citron tea in mid-search for the barcode. He forced a smile and looked up at Dahye. She was smiling brightly, in a surprisingly good mood for someone who had been working late. It probably wasn’t meant to be an offensive comment.

But why did everything Dahye say get under his skin? And she wasn’t done yet.

“Even picking clothes in the morning is a hassle. I wish my company had a uniform like the convenience store.”

Dahye visited the convenience store every day now. She would share every little detail of her day, buy a citron tea, and leave. She probably thought they were friends.

“Are you a manager here or something?” she asked.

Dowon stared at her, narrowing his eyes. Lately, her comments had been more suspicious. He was no longer sure that she wasn’t trying to get under his skin. She glanced up at Dowon, reaching for one of the bottles.

Sounding cautious, she said, “Oh… Are you just a part-timer? Jihyeong owns a convenience store nearby, so I thought you might be running this one, too.”

“Jihyeong Seo?”

“Yeah, he runs two convenience stores, apparently.”

Do convenience stores make that much money? Based on what my boss says, it sure doesn’t seem like it.

The thought of well-off Jihyeong and his Friday night party set Dowon’s palms sweating. He gripped the hem of his uniform shirt. Did Dahye think he was the manager this whole time?

Dahye tilted her head and pushed the second citron tea toward him.

“Well, that’s fine. It’s just a temporary thing, right?”

This wasn’t temporary. Dowon was working at the convenience store for survival. It wasn’t a break from the high life—he was stuck here. He wanted to snap, “What do you know?” at Dahye, but he held back. He didn’t want to show her that side of him.

“They say if you prepare for exams for too long, your brain starts to melt,” Dahye said, her tone encouraging. “Taking a break, spending some time socializing, and clearing your mind before getting back to it will help a lot.”

Dowon had given up on the exam long ago. He was struck once again by the urge to retort, “What do you know?” But Dahye had passed the insanely difficult Hanban Bank exam and now had a job there. So was this advice truly well-intentioned?

But Dahye’s words kept escalating as time passed, gradually tearing down Dowon‘s fragile hopes that she trying to be helpful.

“Dowon, I have some really good news today!”

It had been about a week since Dahye last came to the store. Today, she entered with an even brighter expression, skipping the hot drinks section and heading straight for the counter.

“I’ve been asked to give a lecture at the Currency Museum. I’m in charge of it this time.”

“That’s great.”

“So, I was thinking, why don’t you attend? It’ll really help you.”

Dowon clenched the cigarette cartons he had been organizing. Even if he was stuck working part-time jobs at convenience stores, the fact that he had studied economics at Seoyeon University hadn’t changed. How could Dahye actually suggest a lecture at the Currency Museum to him?

And how was he supposed to take it when she offered him a seat in a lecture that she was leading? He glanced at Dahye’s face, trying to read the thoughts behind her beautiful eyes.

She still looked pleased, like she was giving him a gift. She drummed her fingers on the counter, watching him.

“I studied economics,” he said at last.

“Really?” Dahye looked him over, from head to toe, her pleasant smile still hitched in place. “But this lecture is beyond the undergraduate level.”

She moved closer to the counter. The sound of her drumming fingers was getting on his nerves.

“I still really think it’ll help you. I can put your name on the list and—”

“Hey, Dahye,” Dowon interrupted. Dahye paused her tapping and crossed her arms, gazing evenly at him.

“Yeah?”

He paused.

What should he say? That her words were driving him crazy? That he wished she would stop? That he was still stuck in his glory days of being top of the class, trying to find the smallest comfort in this tiny convenience store, while she kept reminding him of harsh reality and it was unbearable?

Maybe Dahye had approached him from the beginning just to mock him. Maybe that was it. People always want to trample those beneath them, to assert their superiority. It didn’t matter if these thoughts were just paranoia anymore—he was angry.

“I appreciate the help,” he said through gritted teeth. “But… it kind of pisses me off.”

“…Oh.”

“I know you mean well,” he went on, trying to make his tone gentler, despite wishing he could simply tell her to get the hell out. “But, considering my situation, it’s… Well, you get it.”

A part of him feared this might all be in his head, so he had to keep his tone as calm as possible, just in case he was mistaken.

“Did it really bother you? I thought you wouldn’t mind.” Dahye said, her face expressionless. The lively, upbeat tone she’d come in with was long gone. “When you were the one on top, you used to look down on others, just like this.”

The cigarette carton slipped from Dowon’s hand and fell to the floor. He stared down at it.

“That—”

“When people were worse off than you, you thought it was okay to act superior.”

It felt like someone was sitting on the back of Dowon’s neck. His head kept dropping lower.

“And now you’re upset over something as small as this.”

Dahye wasn’t angry, she wasn’t mocking him—her voice was calm, like she was simply stating a fact.

With his face flushed bright red, Dowon clutched the counter, his hands trembling. Leaning against the thin surface, he slowly opened his mouth, hoping the words would come out.

“Back then… I’m sorry…”

Was this karma?

***

Dowon had spent a lot of time thinking about this; if he could go back in time and say something to his high school self, what would it be? Dowon only had one thing in mind.

He would slap himself as hard as he could, and walk off without saying a single word.

“Hey, Dowon Lee, how do you solve this problem?”

“Even if I explain it, you won’t get it.”

Dowon was smart. So much so, that even calling him “smart” felt like an understatement. He had never lost his position as the top student in school. Everywhere he went, people called him a genius, and told him he was amazing.

What kind of person would a child like that grow into, never having experienced failure?

Being number one meant that every student who passed Dowon in the hallway was inferior to him. That was why he felt justified in treating them as if they were beneath him. As if he didn’t want to waste his gaze on stupid or incompetent people.

“Hey, Dahye, what’s with that mistake journal?”

But the person who suffered the most was Dahye. Dahye was always ranked second. Always. Since Dowon never gave up his spot, she was stuck in second place. Both the students and teachers teased Dahye for it, and Dowon made sure to annoy her every time they saw each other.

“Do you really think writing down your mistakes is going to make you remember them any better?”

“Dowon, don’t you have a mistake journal?”

“I would need to make mistakes first.”

Each time, Dahye would laugh brightly in response. And the more she laughed, the more Dowon wanted to get under her skin, to make her show her true face.

It was only natural for lesser people to be filled with a sense of inadequacy and victimhood. He believed Dahye was just putting up a facade of pride, and if Dowon kept poking at her, she might finally snap and tell him to leave her the hell alone.

“Dahye, the reason words aren’t sticking in your head is because you’re trying to memorize them rather than actually learn them. You’re wasting your time.”

His jabs were ceaseless.

“Dahye, your problem-solving is a mess. No wonder it takes you so long.”

But each time, Dahye just laughed. She never backed down, and Dowon found it bizarre. Her grades always fell short of his, so what was there to smile about? He thought she must have already given up. How pitiful.

Once number one, always number one. The starting line for entering society was already established. Unless some disaster struck during the college entrance exam, Dowon was destined to be accepted into Seoyeon University.

He felt he was different from the start. After getting into Seoyeon University, he’d land a good job, build a great family, and live as a winner for the rest of his life. He’d trample on people like those who had begged him to help solve a single problem, and Dahye would be no exception.

Dowon believed he’d coast along that wave forever. Falling from grace was something that only happened to fools who didn’t properly prepare for their future. A prepared winner like him could never fail.

He’d realized far too late that his arrogance could cause him to fall just as smoothly as anyone else, like a row of dominos. It was Dowon’s first and biggest failure.

“Shit…”

Dowon had a sinking feeling that, today, his small studio apartment would gain another hole in the wall. He was nearly unable to bear the shame anymore. The guy who once thought he’d be lording over everyone was now at the very bottom, gazing at the underbellies of everyone he once thought beneath him.

And to top it off, Dahye, whom he had once pitied, assuming she’d given up, now pitied him. She, like he had once done, was probably enjoying the sight of him below her.

“That’s it. I just need to cut ties with Dahye Yoon.”

He couldn’t handle facing Dahye’s daily visits anymore. Dowon called his boss without hesitation, ready to quit on the spot.

“You crazy bastard. There were other people with more experience, but I hired you because you said you’d work here the longest. Are you out of your mind?”

Dowon held the phone slightly away from his ear, wincing.

“You can’t quit until I find the next part-timer. If you try to quit before, I’ll sue you. You’re staying at least until next month.”

Dowon slumped to the convenience store’s floor.

Shit… should I just run away?

Dowon desperately needed a place to escape to, somewhere dark and suffocating that suited the existence he currently found himself living.

***

As soon as his shift ended, Dowon headed straight to Hana’s place. Everything would be okay as long as he was with Hana. She, of all people, understood his situation.

“Hana, I’m coming in.”

But the moment he entered, Dowon there was something terribly wrong with the sanctuary he had come to know. Throwing his shoes off haphazardly, he rushed inside.

“Hana, are you okay?”

He couldn’t believe it. Hana’s place was clean. It looked so spotless that not even a speck of dust would have come off the shelves if he ran his fingers across them.

There was no way she had kept it clean since the last time he helped. For Hana, “normal” meant piling up trash bags in two layers.

“Are you here?”

Crap. Without consciously choosing to, Dowon took a step back.

Standing in the kitchen with a freshly cleaned face, Hana was eying him with a sly smile.

“Do you want to eat first, or take a bath?”

In her current state, Hana was dangerous—unpredictable.

Dowon was forced to come to the conclusion that there was no paradise for people who ran away.